The Decision (and the Real Price of a Dream)

Is a dream still a dream when it costs everything you have just to try?

For weeks, I had been staring at the California State Bar payment page. Not clicking. Just staring.

As a Nigerian-licensed attorney, my goal has always been to become what I call a travel lawyer, someone who practices across borders, understands different legal systems, and takes their career global. California felt like the ultimate challenge. The hardest bar exam in the United States. The one that even American law graduates dread. And here I was, a lawyer from Lagos, deciding to take it on.

But then I started adding up the costs.

The attorney applicant registration fee alone was over $300. The bar review course I needed to actually prepare for this thing? Over $900. Then I had to send my documents and fingerprints to the United States from Lagos, and that alone cost me over 100,000 naira just in shipping and processing. The MPRE is still coming. The visa application fee is already paid. And my visa interview is not even guaranteed, because of the travel ban situation that nobody wants to talk about but that sits in the back of my mind every single day.

I had been saving money to build my own house. That fund is now going toward this exam.

I sat there wondering: is this future I am not even sure of worth redirecting my entire life savings right now? What if I fail? What if I pass and still cannot get a visa to take the exam? What if I do everything right and the door still does not open?

I closed the tab. I opened it again. I thought about the kind of lawyer I want to be. The kind who does not let borders or impossible price tags stop her. The kind who can walk into a room in Lagos, London, or Los Angeles and hold her own.

So I took a deep breath, entered my card details, and clicked pay.

I am taking the California Bar Exam in July 2026.

The craziness has officially begun. Who else is taking a massive, expensive, terrifying leap of faith this year?